info 01.20.05

What We're Dreading in 2005

We've given up worrying about all those things that could wreak havoc on our city. This year, we're all about sweating the small stuff. Here's what we're dreading in 2005.

· Star Jones. The whole thing. Make it stop.

· That the West Side Stadium gets the green light.

· That the High Line doesn't.

· February (except for Christo's "The Gates"), August.

· That the website Salon will disappear.

· That Paula Zahn won't.

· That Advil's next on the recall list.

· That the New-York Historical Society will wither under its new management. (Of course, if it flourishes under same, that will kinda suck, too.)

· Michael Jackson's trial.

· A Times column, television, books, and now book reviews by David Brooks. What next — DB, the fragrance?

· That Bed Bath and Beyond will bring back that large, creepy, animated Santa Claus. If you saw it, you know which one we mean.

· That Frank Wildhorn is writing a new musical.

· That Sondheim isn't.

· That The Amazing Race won't be on every week of the year.

· Not just that the MTA will go through with their asinine plan of corporate sponsorships of its stations, but that we'll have to endure months of hilarious station/sponsor ideas from local media.

· That there won't be enough of Julie Kavner.

· That there are more Hilton sisters.

· Correspondence from County Clerk Norman Goodman.
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